Ryan R. Mei

A: “How do you know something is God’s will and something’s not?”

Me: “If it is allowing me to take away a lesson.”

A: “How do you get to the conclusion that it’s a lesson?”

Me:  “If it’s painful and if it draws you closer to God.  If it requires you to pray, something is going right. The devil wants us to be complacent and not ask God for help and figure things out on our own. We can never.”

Embarking on a spiritual journey without following God’s will is like trying to navigate through a dense and dark forest without a map while wolves are chasing after you. You may initially be able to get lucky by outpacing the wolves and running a route where they aren’t able to chase after you. However, you won’t be able to outrun it forever, as your own strength will eventually give out and you’ll become exhausted, disoriented, and vulnerable. Without a guide, you’re left alone in the darkness, easy prey for the challenges and temptations that hunt you on the journey.

We tend to approach spiritual growth much like any other personal goal, such as the gym. You progressively overload, push until failure, and ensure you complete more reps than last time. Self-reliance promises achievement and control; the world constantly encourages us to “believe in ourselves.” On the contrary, however, life often has a funny way of throwing obstacles in our face. It is during these difficult times that the weight of our limitations grows heavier. Doubts surface, temptations distract, wounds resurface, and progress stalls. In these challenging seasons, it becomes painfully clear that unwavering willpower cannot overcome every spiritual trial.

While having a late-night conversation with one of my close friends in college, he shared with me his fear of uncertainty regarding his future. As a young adult in college, I can personally relate to him as life has been changing at a rapid pace. Balancing clubs, academics, social life, and MMA has definitely been tiring for me and my friend, who’s juggling many more things than I am.

However, this realization and fear isn’t a defeat—it’s the doorway to genuine faith. Our struggles reveal our need for something greater, a source of wisdom and mercy that transcends our own understanding. Relying on God is not an act of weakness, but an acknowledgment of reality: His love and grace fill the spaces where our strength fails.

Instead of striving alone in darkness, we walk with the assurance of His presence. Prayer becomes the lifeline, connecting us to His peace, which is beyond comprehension. Sacred scripture offers comfort and guidance when our own answers run dry. The support of faith communities reminds us we are not alone, but beloved children of God learning together and enlisting in the same army, battling against evil.

Surrendering our self-reliance is the hardest spiritual step. It requires humility. A willingness to admit that we cannot achieve holiness on our own. Yet it is in this surrender that freedom is found. Obstacles remain, but we are never alone, and every hardship becomes an opportunity to deepen our relationship with Him.

Ultimately, an arduous spiritual journey reveals the truth: we need God in every moment. Our will may falter, but His grace restores. By leaning into His strength, we discover a path marked not by our own achievement but by His faithful love accompanying us every step of the way.